tisdag 21 mars 2023

Santa Claus Conquers the Martinis

Santa Claus Conquers the Martinis

Up on Mars nothing will be the same as Gilmar and Bomar has reached puberty - and with it loads of scenery of parties (while intoxicated). Problems thue soon arrive as they couldn't find anyone to serve 'em alcohol until Voldar then arrange for the two teens to aquire some bottles of booze as he passes 'em from his hand to the teenager's hands.

But Voldar didn't use this as a nice gesture as he just wanted the teens to be so intoxicated that they forget all about partying (while holding a secret wish for all partying to be stopped (!!)).

And so it became as Gilmar och Bomar got heavily intoxicated (time and time after another) and so became more and more of a nuisance to their parents Kimar and Momar. As noone knew how they laid there hands on booze they concurrantly didn't know how to stop the teenager's binge drinking.

To find a solution to the problem Kimar visits Mars elderly Chochem but he is not available (not at home). To grasp this evermounting trouble Kimar then visits Chochem's father whome, upon open-ing the conversation, first tells about his own problems with his son who is partying to much for his own good (according to Chochems father) and that his partying not only disencourage his son but also leads to a neglection of his duties as a wise elderly.

Finding just selfloathing from Chochems father; Kimar then decides to finally let, both his children and now also Chochem, in off the hook as he then visits Chochem's father's father (living in a retire-ment home somewhere on Mars).

Upon hearing about Kimar's trouble Chochem's father's father then swiftly uses his might to allow Santa Claus to visit the children pet-a-pet.

Santa Claus then arrange for the teenagers to mix Coke (Coca-Cola) and booze.

This is the end to all bad partying, shrieks Santa Claus!

lördag 18 mars 2023

Santa Claus Conquers the Martins

Santa Claus Conquers the Martins

Christmas is in the heyday and everyone is lingering for yet another successful giftbearing but on Mars something thue's not alright. Seemingly the machine that generates names to all Martians has broken down as it had been used as a television monitor to stream Earth programs to an illiterary Martian population.

The end result in this mixup (??) was the autogenerative of [Unknown Boy #x] and [Unknown Girl #y] as the names for our two beforecomplied kids with their parents getting labelled [Unknown Man #t] and [Unknown Woman #v].

The only one that can save 'em now seems to be the Martian elderly 'Chochem' but as the quattro got to see him he seemingly had changed his name to [Unknown Elderly #1] and was to busy wat-ching Earth television to hear out our quattro.

That's when [Unknown Man #t] and [Uknown Woman #v] travels to Earth to visit the 'Earth Elder-ly' to see if he maybe has a solution to the problem.

But as the duo used an outdated telephone book (who uses 'em on Mars these days (?!)) and so mis-sed out the fact that the 'Earth Elderly' coinstated with Santa Claus (!!) their plan had seemngly went stale.

But so with Santa Claus now briefed of the problem he lended the Martians a vhs-cassette that co-uld be used as an exposé over Santa's workshop (and subsequently dubbed to the language of the Martian's) and with this the names of the Martian children (protagonists) changed from [Unknown Boy #x] and [Unknown Girl #y] to Martin Martian and Martina Martian (!!).

This is the end of all bad television - shrieked Santa Claus!

onsdag 8 mars 2023

Santa Claus Conquers the (Martian) Amoebas

Santa Claus Conquers the (Martian) Amoebas

'If it wasn't for the Martians, universe could have been a friendly space' - Santa Claus starts his Christmas speach for peace. 'These Martians will soon leave our galaxy' - he continues.

But the thing was that noone had really spotted these Martians anywhere but learned about their galaxy restoration (conquering) in their school education. Furtheron; noone had really not seen them anywhere with their large battlecruisers beaming through space annihilating everyone of it's friends (!?) aswell as enemies.

But this Christmas - Santa Claus had set his mind -- acting on behalf of all Earthlings --- with the whole galaxy resting on his shoulders ---- to conquer these darn Martians and stop the terror once and for all.

This a strong was Santa Claus' might that he was inaugurating a new 'United Planets'-meeting (pretty much as a meeting within the United Nations (of Earth) but with extraterrestrial from outer planets as its members).

During this meeting the Martians would then be left with the occasion to redeem themselves and to explain their (war)reasoning - but in doing so the Martians would spell out a quest for new vitamines - and nothing more - as they tried to explain their reasoning.

This odd shriek seemed not worthy a galactic enterprise such as the one the Martians was known for and left little to nothing when their next hearing (at the UP meeting) when they solemnly demanded an enlargement gun.

Too bad I'm the only amoeba with a brain - shrieked the one (concurrant) of the Martians.

This is the end of the anti-amoeban reign of the galaxy - shrieked Santa Claus!